All I Learned About Being Mom, I Learned From My Kids

I have been a mama for seven years now.  

No, that doesn't make me an expert...but it does give some experiences.  I have failed, succeeded, loved, screamed, and even been scared to death.  All of that has brought me here.  But everything I know about being a mom, I learned from my kids.  Here are just a few examples of things my own kids have taught me by their responses to my behavior:

1. To be confident about my body after kids.

(Even boys can have a lack of confidence)
"Mom, I think I need to lose weight." 

A couple of years ago, I was on the fast track to being a healthier, better me.  I ran every day, tracked my food intake, and lost about 15 pounds all while toning my body.  I felt great.  But then, I became pregnant with my third son and after I had him, I was pretty down about my body and how much work it was going to take in order to put everything back into place. Hmmm... That is exactly how I felt.

I would often make comments in front my children, and even ask them if they thought I was getting skinnier or gaining more weight.  I would take pictures and compare over a span of months, all while my young boys were watching me handle this battle in my mind over my appearance.

Pretty soon, I noticed my oldest one looking in the mirror and comparing himself to others.  He would say things like, "Mom, I know I am fat and need to lose weight..."

I was disgusted with myself, because I knew I was the one that had planted the idea in his head.  He watched me compare myself to models and tv stars.  In his little mind, he thought...If this is a big deal for mommy, it should be a big deal to me too.

"Whoa! Sweet heart!", I exclaimed.
"What are you talking about? You are not fat.  You are seven years old.  Your body is perfect.  Mommy just feels like her body is so much different than it used to be because I had three babies.", I explained.

I couldn't believe it.  I never thought a little boy would think twice about his body.  A little girl...sure!  But he did.  He watched me every time I looked at my body in disgust.

I am still battling this issue in my own mind.  Its a struggle most women that have brought children into the world deal with as our bodies become the nursing station for months and years and we feel worn out.  We feel like there is no time for us to catch up and put our body first.

If this is you, let me encourage you.  There is a season for everything.  The Word of God even says so.
As moms, we feel worn out most of the time.  Even when we take time to go on dates and dress up, we still feel behind in taking care of ourselves, because of the responsibilities to our kids on a daily basis.

All we can do is try our best and take time for ourselves when the chance is given, and realize this season doesn't last forever.  Our confidence is passed to our children.  We must be confident in who we are and see the blessings our bodies have given us.



2.  To realize I really am a great mom...despite how I feel.
"Mom, you are the best mommy in the world.  Do you know how I know?  It's because you make all those meals I love and you are sweet to me." 

I am going to be bold and remind you that as a moms, we cannot be replaced.  You are irreplaceable.   Trust me I know this first hand.  Sometimes I feel like just can't keep up.  I mean the list is endless.  I feel like I am always cooking, always cleaning, and then there is teaching the kids, chasing my upcoming toddler, soccer practices, taking care of the hubs, and then the pets.

We have to realize our calling to our children.  You are exceeding your expectations whether you see it or not.  I literally cannot stay up late anymore because my days are so full.  I crash when my head hits the pillow at ten o'clock, because I rarely sit down during the day.

These days feel like a whirlwind.  The sun rises and the sun sets.  To accomplish everything in that time span can be tricky... to keep ourselves looking put together, the house clean, and meals coming every few hours can be exhausting.

But we are doing it.  And I just want to say, keep up the good work!

You will hear affirmation from your children.  All you have to do is listen.


3.  I spend too much time on devices.
"Mom, put down your phone."

It takes a lot of work on the computer to write a book, keep up a blog, and be in the know about what is going on in the world.  I very rarely get a chance to sit down and watch tv/news uninterrupted so I quickly scan the news reels to see what has changed and get an update.  I spend lots of time editing and writing.  My boys don't know what I am doing, but they know that Facebook/social media can be an addiction, and they keep me accountable.  It's funny really.

Being a stay at home mom, I sometimes just long for adult conversation and the expressions of mature thoughts...even in my own mind for that matter.  It's just a season, but sometimes picking up my device is my escape from the noise of young kids.  I am thinking, they are picking up on that.

I need to work on calling the ones I love more often instead of relying on the ever accessible status updates from people I never see.  Guilty!  I read an article lately about how moms sit at the park an play on their phones while their little girl is twirling and laughing.  We have so many devices at our disposal, we could very easily let real life pass us by.

While we try to teach our children all about life, our children teach us what life is all about.

 Author: Angela Schwindt